Confession Brings Freedom
To be an effective peacemaker, you need to deal honestly with your contribution to a conflict. As Paul told Timothy, “If a man cleanses himself from [sin], he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work” (2 Tim. 2:21). This cleansing process is inspired by Jesus’ promise that he has forgiven our sins and wants to purify us from the idols and habits that cause conflict (1 John 1:9). He calls us to cooperate in this process of repentance, self-examination, confession, and personal change. The more faithfully you draw on his grace and pursue these steps, the more useful you will be to him in making peace. At the same time, after you get the log out of your own eye, you will he better prepared to gently restore others.
1. Read Psalm 139:23-24, then ask God to help you see if you have sinned in any of the following ways in this situation. If so, note how.
• Allowed a desire to turn into an idol
• Used my tongue as a weapon (careless words, gossip, falsehood)
• Tried to control others
• Failed to keep my word or commitments
• Failed to respect authority, or failed use my authority graciously
• Was defensive or resisted correction
• Failed to treat others as I would like to be treated
2. Use the Seven A’s to plan your confession:
• Address everyone involved. To whom do you need to confess? (PM @ 127; Ps. 32:5; James 5:16; Luke 19:8)
• Avoid if, but, and maybe. What excuses or blaming do you need to avoid? (PM @ 127-128)
• Admit specifically. What desires have you allowed to rule you, and what sins have you committed? What biblical principles have you violated? (PM @ 128-129; Ezra 9:5-15)
• Acknowledge the hurt. How might others feel as a result of your sin? (PM @ 130)
• Accept the consequences. What consequences do you need to accept? How can you reverse the damage you have caused? (PM @ 131; Luke 15:19; 19:8)
• Alter your behavior. What changes do you intend to make, with God’s help, in the way you think, speak, and behave in the future? (PM @ 131-132; Matt. 3:8; Acts 26:20)
• Ask for forgiveness. What might make the person you have wronged reluctant to forgive you? What can you do to make it easier for him or her to forgive you? (PM @ 132-134)
3. When will you make your confession?
